'' Take it off immediately! '' And after? How to change style

1. Resistance to change: why?
2. The woman changed her appearance: what next?

Content:

Now there are a lot of different TV shows on different channels dedicated to the "magic transformations" from a gray mouse into a beauty: "Fashion sentence", "Remove it immediately!", "Restart". Women actually go there to change their lives - but, surprisingly, as experience shows, most often after the transfer everything returns to normal. Why?

The plot is usually this: there was an ordinary girl / woman (sometimes grandmother), but the men avoided, there were no friends, the career did not develop, and in general somehow everything was boring and sad ... And then she came to the TV show, she was made a written beauty with a fashionable wardrobe, praised her verbally in the presence of relatives and friends - and everything went well for her. Well, or it will be good - after all fairy tales usually end this way.

The heroine of the programs about "magic transformations" can be divided into several groups.

1. Women of hard fate

This is the largest group, including women after a severe divorce; girls with authoritarian parents; women with "problematic" appearance, giving birth to various complexes. Due to serious reasons and circumstances, they no longer look after themselves, look bad, which negatively affects their career and personal life.

2. Women with unbanal addictions

These women adhere to certain habits that do not always cause a positive reaction from others. They dress in the Gothic style, in the style of "pink" Barbie, someone prefers ethnic / hip-hop / reggae / rock and roll styles. It seems to them that this makes them stand out from the crowd, makes them unique, original, reflects their rich inner world. Such a vital and "dressing room" position deters decent employers and decent men.

3. Young mothers

This group does not need a detailed description. I suspect that most women, who have at least one child, are familiar with the change of life priorities, the tremendous lack of time and endless fatigue mixed with chronic lack of sleep. Sometimes young mothers return to their former one - charming and attractive as soon as the child gets older. Or they finally forget about themselves - then caring mothers and sisters bring the heroines to such programs or indignant husbands (although I don’t understand the latter: if a woman is a favorite, why should you be outraged and not do everything that is possible and not help her? ).

4. Lazy or ignorant

This group includes women and girls who are either lazy and reluctant to engage in themselves, or lack the knowledge, experience, and taste to look like the top five. However, if you believe the programs of "magical transformations", in most cases all their heroines - under the three previous masks - are lazy and ignorant, therefore it is enough to make an effort, add self-confidence, reduce laziness - and happiness will increase.

But is it really?

Our television generally loves "magical transformations". There is a TV program format very similar to the one described above: the transformation of an ordinary dwelling into a “dream house”. Have you ever watched the issues of such programs devoted to how the hosts lived further in their “choruses” and what they subsequently did with them? In most cases, the story is the same: interiors created without the direct participation of the owners were subjected to inevitable, inexorable and not always beautiful alteration. Sooner or later, the owners of the apartments reworked them back "for themselves," and there was a minimum of remarkable repair and original design solutions.

It is a pity that the "converted" girls - but not immediately after, but half a year later - are not shown on TV. I suspect that such a transfer would be instructive. But there was an English program about a "robot converter", which showed the heroes in a few months: well, most of them returned to their original image, and only a few really changed not only their appearance, but also their lives.

To the content

Resistance to change: why?

There is a whole science dealing with the topic of resistance to change. True, she studies how employees resist changes in the company's work. But the reasons, the consequences - and the recommendations of the researchers - are quite applicable in the case of sudden changes in appearance - especially someone imposed.

James O'Toole in his book “Managing Changes” highlighted more than three dozen reasons for resistance to change, including:

• inertia ("So much strength is needed to lose weight! Well, it is him!"), satisfaction ("I like myself and I like it"),
• fear ("Will I get a red color? .."),
• futility ("All the same, men will not pay attention to me"),
• lack of knowledge ("I absolutely do not understand anything in fashion"),
• collective fantasies ("I know that pink is a new trend!"),
• ideology ("Appearance is not important. But I have a rich inner world!"),
• and even a banal habit ("I've been dressing like this all my life!").

It is these reasons that lead to the fact that people find themselves on programs about "transformations", where, in most cases, they are led by friends and relatives.

Already on set, the heroines pass, - again, according to O'Toole, - six stages of resistance to change:

1. Passivity (lead to the transfer of heroines, but they internally disagree with criticism).
2. Denial (heroines tell about their life position and deny that they have problems)
3. Anger (this is a necessary part for high ratings of any TV shows)
4. Negotiations (most of the programs are involved in this, persuading and persuading the heroines to experiment with appearance)
5. The crisis (having seen itself updated in the mirror, having heard the reaction to its "new" appearance from the side of the hall or reputable experts, the heroines of the program experience a pleasant shock)
6. Acceptance (on the wave of positive emotions, the heroines promise to "improve" and stick to a predetermined course).

To the content

The woman changed her appearance: what next?

So why are the changes, even if they are for the better, and approved by close people and relatives, are not fixed?

The answer is simple: the heroines are set free. They return to the usual way of life. But in order to overcome inertia, consolidate positive changes, according to the researchers of this problem, it is necessary to work on yourself further, after the program.

According to Donald Sall, described in the book "Why good companies fail, and how outstanding managers revive them," setting a new goal for themselves, it is necessary to take into account the existing system of values . If the heroines firmly believe that men are looking for women with a rich inner world, not a stylish haircut and fashionable wardrobe, it is unlikely that after returning from a television show, in a month they will again go to the hairdresser and regularly go shopping in new clothes.

Bodo Schaefer, a recognized expert in achieving financial independence and success, writes in all his books that change is an adequate price for success, but they need to be started by changing the way of thinking. So in order to maintain a positive effect, the heroines will have to believe that the hairstyle and the wardrobe will at least not hurt.

John Cotter, in his book Ahead of Change, points out the important role of communication, and especially learning , when introducing change. Returning to the usual life, the heroines should be interested in fashion, new cosmetology, effective fitness programs, in general, to broaden their horizons and simply learn.

The author also recommends to create a coalition with a strong, authoritative, and committed to these changes for the effective implementation of changes. It is important that upon returning from the show, the heroines are supported, directed and praised by close people whose opinion is highly valued, for example, mother, husband or children.

And finally, Jan Katzenbach, one of the authors of the book Leaders of Genuine Change, writes that it is important to achieve real, tangible results at the earliest stages of the process . The strongest motivator to preserve changes in appearance will be going to the cinema, to the exhibition, to the cafe, where they catch many admiring glances from the men. So it is advisable to do such raids more often, and to start right after the show.

But maybe those heroines are right who return to themselves, to their usual images? Do they really need these changes? .. Of course, it's up to the women themselves. But I agree with one of the famous laws of Murphy: "Change is an integral part of constancy . " In other words, constantly changing, we still remain ourselves. So why not try?

Discussion

Everything from poverty. Take the same fashionable sentence, the wardrobe pulls thousands for two hundred. Where did the teacher (here you can substitute any average statistical profession) such money for clothes? Children need to feed, teach, patch the roof, change the vacuum cleaner, and so on. Not a single program teaches how to dress for 1000 rubles and look like 100 000. Therefore, the poor things, pushing between the hairdresser at the entrance, the Khachik market and the City shoe store, return this to their reality. They put on a down-padded jacket, pants and croos donated by mom and try to survive further.

Good article. It was interesting to read and informative for me!

I do not agree with the previous review. It is not necessary to be super fashionable and dress in bows. It is important to have your own individual style of dressing, since it is not otherwise how he will tell about you more than you actually think other people. Clothing is a kind of code language that carries information about you and a tool to manage the impression of you, allowing you to achieve the desired goals! People understood this and use this tool for their own purposes.
Clothes are not just rags, as you say! It is an indicator of your intellect, thinking, creativity, education, social status, etc.
And it’s not so easy to create your own style and combine different textures, prints, colors, styles, etc.
This is a constant puzzle!))

Moscow is fixated on clothes, and those normal women who do not want to become glamorous are publicly pressed on such programs. And all this is just rags! And a normal man REALLY chooses a woman with a rich inner world! And the article is designed to confuse the women head and send them to the shops (as it says there?) For new clothes! Married women who dress modestly and inconspicuously (as they should!) The author calls lazy, ignorant, women of difficult fate (that is, losers). And in my opinion, it is a pity that women just aged look on our screens and on the subway, trying to dress up as glamorous youth. "I am not a grandmother, I am a lady." Well, then put on a long skirt and a hat, and not a "vintage" mini-skirt "from Valentino"! And so you are not a lady, but a glamorous old fool.

11/03/2013 11:12:46, at

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